Elderly gentlemen, gentle in all respects, kind to animals, beloved by children, and fond of music, are found in lonely corners of the downs, hacking at sandpits or tussocks of grass, and muttering in a blind, ungovernable fury elaborate maledictions which could not be extracted from them by robbery or murder. Men who would face torture without a word become blasphemous at the short fourteenth. It is clear that the game of golf may well be included in that category of intolerable provocations which may legally excuse or mitigate behavior not otherwise excusable.
—A. P. Herbert (1890–1971) English Humorist, Novelist, Playwright, Politician
The great thing about this game is that the bad days are wonderful.
—Bill Clinton (b.1946) American Head of State, Lawyer, Public Speaker
Golf is more fun than walking naked in a strange place, but not much
—Buddy Hackett (1924–2003) American Comedian, Actor
When I want a long ball, I spin my hips faster
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
There’s no game like golf: you go out with three friends, play eighteen holes, and return with three enemies
—Unknown
I don’t need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course?
—Babe Ruth (1895–1948) American Baseball Legend
Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture
—Winston Churchill (1874–1965) British Head of State, Political leader, Historian, Journalist, Author
A golf course is the epitome of all that is purely transitory in the universe; a space not to dwell in, but to get over as quickly as possible
—Jean Giraudoux (1882–1944) French Novelist, Playwright, Essayist
In the game of life it’s a good idea to have a few early losses, which relieves you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season.
—Burton Hillis (William E. Vaughan) (1915–77) American Columnist, Author
The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for front-line workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
—Indian Proverb
I like trying to win. That’s what golf is all about.
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don’t know when it’s through if you are a crook or a martyr.
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
A day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.
—William Wordsworth (1770–1850) English Poet
I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone’s golf game: it’s called an eraser.
—Arnold Palmer (b.1929) American Sportsperson
Art said he wanted to get more distance. I told him to hit it and run backward.
—Ken Venturi (1931–2013) American Golfer, Sportscaster
Focus on remedies, not faults.
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
Golf is a sport in which the ball lies poorly but the player well
—Indian Proverb
It is a hopeless endeavour to unite the contrarieties of spring and winter; it is unjust to claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood.
—Samuel Johnson (1709–84) British Essayist
There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different..
—Ben Hogan (1912–97) American Golfer
I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.
—Ben Hogan (1912–97) American Golfer
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off.
—Unknown
Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you’re the best.
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
Always make a total effort, even when the odds are against you.
—Arnold Palmer (b.1929) American Sportsperson
Why Don’t you aim more to the right?
—Ben Hogan (1912–97) American Golfer
We have fifty-one golf courses in Palm Springs. He(Gerald Ford) never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot…At least he can’t cheat on his score- because all you have to do is look back down the fairway and count the wounded
—Bob Hope (1903–2003) British-born American Comedian
I’ve always made a total effort, even when the odds seemed entirely against me. I never quit trying; I never felt that I didn’t have a chance to win.
—Arnold Palmer (b.1929) American Sportsperson
Tee your ball high…the air offers less resistance than dirt
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
Golf is not sacred, and there is no use getting so gosh-darned solemn about it
—Don Herold (1889–1966) American Humorist, Writer, Illustrator, Cartoonist
Born to golf. Forced to work.
—Unknown
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