Inspirational Quotes by Robert Orben (American Humorist)

Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.
—Robert Orben

Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?
—Robert Orben
Topics: Politics

More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems, back taxes, back rent, back auto payments.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Money

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Wealth, Money

The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Birthdays

These are the days when it takes all you’ve got just to keep up with the losers.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Competition

Most people want to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Self-Control

Washington is a place where politicians don’t know which way is up and taxes don’t know which way is down.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Cities, Government, City Life

Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.
—Robert Orben

Every speaker has a mouth; An arrangement rather neat. Sometimes it’s filled with wisdom. Sometimes it’s filled with feet.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Speaking, Speakers

To err is human—and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Computers

Old people shouldn’t eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Health, Age

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
—Robert Orben
Topics: One liners, Ignorance, Failure, Education

If you can laugh together, you can work together.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Teamwork

A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.
—Robert Orben

Don’t think of it as failure. Think of it as time-released success.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Failure

Quit worrying about your health. It’ll go away.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Worry, Health

Time flies. It’s up to you to be the navigator.
—Robert Orben
Topics: One liners, Time, Time Management

Wait’ll next year! is the favorite cry of baseball fans, football fans, hockey fans, and gardeners.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Future, Hope

Never raise your hand to your children—it leaves your mid-section unprotected.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Children

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that “individuality” is the key to success.
—Robert Orben
Topics: Graduation