Dorothy Parker (1893–1967,) née Rothschild, was an American short-story writer, poet, screenwriter, and critic who was well-known for her witty remarks, biting prose, and verse satires. She wrote book reviews and short stories for The New Yorker magazine, becoming one of its renowned wits. Her style of spontaneous wit and acerbic criticism has had a lasting influence.
Born in West End, near Long Beach, New Jersey, to Scottish-Jewish parents, Parker never finished high school. She began work in 1916 as a theatre reviewer for Vanity Fair and turned into a book reviewer for The New Yorker in 1927. Her first book of poems, Enough Rope (1927,) became a best-seller; this allowed her to quit her job and work freelance. Parker remained a leading contributor to The New Yorker. She was one of the founders of the Algonquin Round Table, an informal literary group.
Enough Rope, together with Sunset Gun (1928) and Death and Taxes (1931,) was collected in Not So Deep as a Well (1936.) Parker’s short prose pieces printed in Laments for the Living (1930) and After Such Pleasures (1933) were accumulated in Here Lies (1939.)
Parker also collaborated on several film scripts, including A Star is Born (1937) and The Little Foxes (1941.) Her extraordinary talent for witty epigrams is evident throughout her work.
A lifelong advocate of left-wing causes, Parker worked as a newspaper correspondent in Spain during the civil war. She left her estate to the civil rights leader Martin Luther King, Jr.
More: Wikipedia • READ: Works by Dorothy Parker
Scratch a lover, and find a foe.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Lovers, Love
Once when I was young and true,
Someone left me sad-
Broke my brittle heart in two;
And that was very bad.
Love is for unlucky folk.
Love is but a curse.
Once there was a heart I broke;
And that, I think, is worse.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Love
Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter’s pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Autumn
Oh, it is sure as it is sad
That any lad is every lad,
And what’s a girl, to dare implore
Her dear be hers forevermore?
Though he be tried and he be bold,
And swearing death should he be cold,
He’ll run the path the others went….
But you, my sweet, are different.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Marriage
Razors pain you; rivers are damp; acids stain you; and drugs cause cramp. Guns aren’t lawful; nooses give; gas smells awful; you might as well live.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Suicide
If you’re going to write, don’t pretend to write down. It’s going to be the best you can do, and it’s the fact that it’s the best you can do that kills you.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Authors & Writing, Writers, Writing
I shall stay the way I am because I do not give a damn.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Apathy
I never see the prettiest thing –
A cherry bough gone white with Spring –
But what I think, How gay ‘twould be
To hang me from a flowering tree.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Death
By the time you swear you’re his,
Shivering and sighing,
And he vows his passion is
Infinite, undying –
Lady, make a note of this:
One of you is lying.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Love, Deception/Lying
Well, there are always those who cannot distinguish between glitter and glamour …
—Dorothy Parker
Lips that taste of tears, they say,
Are the best for kissing.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Crying, Kiss
I never thought that heav’n would lose its blue
And sullen storm-clouds mask the gentle sky;
I never thought the rose’s velvet hue
Would pale and sicken, though we said good-by.
I never dreamed the lark would hush its note
As day succeeded ever-drearier day,
Nor knew the song that swelled the robin’s throat
Would fade to silence, when you went away.
I never knew the sun’s irradiant beams
Upon the brooding earth no more would shine,
Nor thought that only in my mocking dreams
Would happiness that once I knew be mine.
I never thought the slim moon, mournfully,
Would shroud her pallid self in murky night.
Dear heart, I never thought these things would be-
I never thought they would, and I was right.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Loss
I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Wealth
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, A medley of extemporanea; And love is a thing than can never go wrong; And I am Marie of Roumania.
—Dorothy Parker
He’d have given me rolling lands,
Houses of marble, and billowing farms,
Pearls, to trickle between my hands,
Smoldering rubies, to circle my arms.
You- you’d only a lilting song,
Only a melody, happy and high,
You were sudden and swift and strong-
Never a thought for another had I.
He’d have given me laces rare,
Dresses that glimmered with frosty sheen,
Shining ribbons to wrap my hair,
Horses to draw me, as fine as a queen.
You- you’d only to whistle low,
Gayly I followed wherever you led.
I took you, and I let him go-
Somebody ought to examine my head!
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Choice
She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Actors, Acting
Out in Hollywood, where the streets are paved with Goldwyn, the word
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Fame
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Boredom, Bores, Curiosity
Constant use will not wear ragged the fabric of friendship.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Friendship
They laid their hands upon my head,
They stroked my cheek and brow;
And time could heal a hurt, they said,
And time could dim a vow.
And they were pitiful and mild
Who whispered to me then;
The heart that breaks in April, child;
Will mend in May again.
Oh, many a mended heart they knew;
So old they were, and wise.
And little did they have to do
To come to me with lies!
Who flings me silly talk of May
Shall meet a bitter soul;
For June was nearly spent away
Before my heart was whole.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Heart
Enjoyed it! One more drink and I’d have been under the host.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Parties, Party
The best way to keep children at home is to make home a pleasant atmosphere – and to let the air out of the tires.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Children, Home
Drink, and dance and laugh and lie, love the reeling midnight through, for tomorrow we shall die! (But, alas, we never do.)
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Parties, Party
There’s a helluva distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Words, Wit, Humor
Why is it no one ever sent me yet one perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it’s always just my luck to get one perfect rose.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Giving, Charity, Wealth
Money is only congealed snow.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Snow
As only New Yorkers know, if you can get through the twilight, you’ll live through the night.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Difficulty
This book is not to be tossed lightly aside, but to be hurled with great force.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Reading, Books
I can’t talk about Hollywood. It was a horror to me when I was there and it’s a horror to look back on. I can’t imagine how I did it. When I got away from it I couldn’t even refer to the place by name. “Out there,” I called it.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Hollywood
I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remember any of the damned things.
—Dorothy Parker
Topics: Quotations
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