Philip Dormer Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield (1694–1773) was an English statesman, diplomat, man of letters, and a much-admired wit of his time. Many of his leading contemporaries praised Chesterfield’s courteous manners, urbanity, and wit.
Stanhope wrote Lord Chesterfield’s Advice to his Son, on Men and Manners (1774,) a guide to manners and success, which essayist Samuel Johnson denounced as teaching “the morals of a whore, and the manners of a dancing master.”
Born in London, Lord Chesterfield was a Member of Parliament 1715–c.1723. In 1730, he was made Lord Steward of the household. Until then, as a Whig, he had supported Sir Robert Walpole; but being expelled from office for voting against an excise bill, he became one of Walpole’s harshest antagonists. Chesterfield joined the ministry of Thomas Pelham-Holles in 1744, became Irish Lord Lieutenant in 1745, and was one of the principal secretaries of state in 1746.
Lord Chesterfield is the acclaimed author of Maxims, the popular title for the collection of letters of advice he wrote to his illegitimate son, to help him overcome the handicap of his birth (only legitimate sons could inherit.) The letters, dating from 1736, were published in 1774 by Philip’s widow. Originally titled Lord Chesterfield’s Advice to his Son, on Men and Manners; or, a New system of Education in Which the Principles of Politeness, the Art of Acquiring a Knowledge of the World, with Every Instruction Necessary to Form a Man of Honour, Virtue, Taste and Fashion are Laid Down, the letters are the forerunner of a modern self-help book.
Friendly with Jonathan Swift, Alexander Pope, John Gay, Voltaire, and Viscount Bolingbroke, Lord Chesterfield drew from Samuel Johnson a famous indignant letter. Besides the Letters to His Son, he also wrote Letters to his Godson and Successor (1890.) His Letters to Lord Huntingdon were published in 1923.
More: Wikipedia • READ: Works by Earl of Chesterfield
Let the great book of the world be your principle study.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Fear manifested invites danger; concealed cowards insult known ones.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Fear
Be your character what it will, it will be known; and nobody will take it upon your word.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Character
Men will not believe because they will not broaden their minds.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Belief
Modesty is the only sure bait when you angle for praise.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Modesty, Humility, Compliments
As fathers commonly go, it is seldom a misfortune to be fatherless; and considering the general run of sons, as seldom a misfortune to be childless.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Father, Fathers, Family
Wit is so shining a quality that everybody admires it; most people aim at it, all people fear it, and few love it unless in themselves. A man must have a good share of wit himself to endure a great share of it in another.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Wit, Humor
A man who cannot command his temper should not think of being a man of business.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Temper
Let your enemies be disarmed by the gentleness of your manner, but at the same time let them feel, the steadiness of your resentment.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Enemy, Enemies
In matters of religion and matrimony I never give any advice; because I will not have anybody’s torments in this world or the next laid to my charge.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Advice
If a fool knows a secret, he tells it because he is a fool: if a knave knows one, he tells it whenever it is his interest to tell it. But women and young men are very apt to tell what secrets they know, from the vanity of having been trusted. Trust none of these whenever you can help it.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Secrecy
Pleasure is a reciprocal; no one feels it who does not at the same time give it. To be pleased, one must please.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Giving, Kindness, Helpfulness, Service, Happiness, Goodwill
Real merit of any kind cannot long be concealed; it will be discovered, and nothing can depreciate it but a man exhibiting it himself. It may not always be rewarded as it ought; but it will always be known.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Merit
Let your letter be written as accurately as you are able—I mean as to language, grammar, and stops; but as to the matter of it the less trouble you give yourself the better it will be. Letters should be easy and natural, and convey to the persons to whom we send just what we should say if we were with them.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Letters
It is by vivacity and wit that man shines in company; but trite jokes and loud laughter reduce him to a buffoon.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Wit
A man’s own good breeding is the best security against other people’s ill manners.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Manners
Cautiously avoid speaking of the domestic affairs either of yourself, or of other people. Yours are nothing to them but tedious gossip; and theirs are nothing to you.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Talking, Family
When I reflect upon what I have seen, have heard, and have done, I can hardly persuade myself that all that frivolous hurry and bustle and pleasure of the world had any reality; and I look on what has passed as one of those wild dreams which opium occasions, and I by no means wish to repeat the nauseous dose for the sake of the fugitive illusion.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Life
When a person is in fashion, all they do is right.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Fashion
Mutual comulaisances, attentions, and sacrifices of little conveniences, are as natural an implied compact between civilized people, as protection and obedience are between kings and subjects; whoever, in either case, violates that compact, justly forfeits all advantages arising from it.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Politeness
Style is the dress of thoughts; and let them be ever so just, if your style is homely, coarse, and vulgar, they will appear to as much disadvantage, and be as ill received, as your person, though ever so well-proportioned, would if dressed in rags, dirt, and tatters.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Style
Lord Tyrawley and I have been dead these two years, but we don’t choose to have it known.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Retirement, Aging
Words are the dress of thoughts; which should no more be presented in rags, tatters, and dirt than your person should
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Words
A letter shows the man it is written to as well as the man it is written by.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Letters
Women are much more like each other than men: they have, in truth, but two passions, vanity and love; these are their universal characteristics.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Vanity
Dress yourself fine, where others are fine, and plain, where others are plain; but take care always that your clothes are well made and fit you, for otherwise they will give you a very awkward sir.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Dress
I find, by experience, that the mind and the body are more than married, for they are most intimately united; and when one suffers, the other sympathizes.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: The Mind, Mind
Can an author with reason complain that he is cramped and shackled if he is not at liberty to publish blasphemy, bawdry, or sedition?; all of which are equally prohibited in the freest governments, if they are wise and well-regulated ones.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Authors & Writing
Do as you would be done by, is the surest method of pleasing.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Doing
No man tastes pleasures truly, who does not earn them by previous business; and few people do business well, who do nothing else.
—Earl of Chesterfield
Topics: Business, Balance
Wondering Whom to Read Next?
Francis Thompson English Poet
William Blackstone English Judge
Thomas Henry Huxley English Biologist
Edmund Spenser English Poet
E. V. Lucas English Author
Jane Austen English Novelist
Isaac Newton English Physicist
Jackie Collins English Romance Novelist
Philip James Bailey English Poet
Arthur Conan Doyle Scottish Writer