Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn’t it, of a long line of proven criminals?
He without benefit of scruples
His fun and money soon quadruples.
I’d rather be a great bad poet than a good bad poet.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.
I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.
O misery, misery, mumble and moan!
Someone invented the telephone,
And interrupted a nation’s slumbers,
Ringing wrong but similar numbers.
If some confectioners were willing
To let the shape announce the filling,
We’d encounter fewer assorted chocs,
Bitten into and returned to the box.
I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.
Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor.
Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them.
A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.
You can take it as understood That your luck changes only if it’s good.
Man is a victim of dope in the incurable form of hope.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
My garden will never make me famous, I’m a horticultural ignoramus.
How easy for those who do not bulge to not overindulge!
There are people who are very resourceful
At being remorseful,
And who apparently feel that the best way to make friends
Is to do something terrible and then make amends.
Good wine needs no bush, and perhaps products that people really want need no hard-sell or soft-sell TV push. Why not? Look at pot.
Wondering Whom to Read Next?
- Russell Hoban American Author
- Dorothy L. Sayers English Novelist, Playwright
- Helen Gurley Brown American Publisher
- Mark Van Doren American Poet, Critic
- Wallace Stevens American Poet
- Will Rogers American Humorist, Actor
- Frank O’Hara American Poet, Art Critic
- Conrad Aiken American Poet, Novelist
- Stanley Kunitz American Poet
- Henry Adams American Historian