My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
Everyone gets their rough day. No one gets a free ride. Today so far, I had a good day. I got a dial tone.
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.
Wondering Whom to Read Next?
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- Jerry Seinfeld American Comedian
- Buddy Hackett American Comedian
- Bob Newhart American Comedian
- Jonathan Winters American Comedian
- Bill Maher American Comedian, TV Personality
- Jimmy Fallon American Comedian
- Robin Williams American Actor
- Whoopi Goldberg American Comedian
- Phyllis Diller American Actor