The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible.
—David Ogilvy (1911–99) British-American Advertising Executive
Suppose the world were only one of God’s jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?
—George Bernard Shaw (1856–1950) Irish Playwright
If we live inside a bad joke, it is up to us to learn, at best and worst, to tell it well.
—Jonathan Raban (1942–2023) British Writer
That’s what makes us a great nation. We take the little things serious, and the big ones as a joke.
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being, but to remind him that he is already degraded.
—George Orwell (1903–50) English Novelist, Journalist
A caricature is putting the face of a joke on the body of a truth.
—Joseph Conrad (1857–1924) Polish-born British Novelist
He jests at scars that never felt a wound.
—William Shakespeare (1564–1616) British Playwright
The average man is proof enough that a woman can take a joke.
—Unknown
All womankind, from the highest to the lowest love jokes; the difficulty is to know how they choose to have them cut; and there is no knowing that, but by trying, as we do with our artillery in the field, by raising or letting down their breeches, till we hit the mark.
—Laurence Sterne (1713–68) Irish Anglican Novelist, Clergyman
A rich man’s joke is always funny.
—Thomas Edward Brown (1830–97) Manx Poet, Scholar
The crisis of yesterday is the joke of tomorrow.
—H. G. Wells (1866–1946) English Novelist, Historian, Social Thinker
Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a “joke.”
—Ambrose Bierce (1842–1913) American Short-story Writer, Journalist
A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke-and that the joke is oneself.
—Clifton Fadiman (1904–99) American Author, Radio Personality
If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
—Groucho Marx (1890–1977) American Actor, Comedian, Singer
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
My way of joking is to tell the truth; it’s the funniest joke in the world.
—George Bernard Shaw (1856–1950) Irish Playwright
My life has been one great big joke,
A dance that’s walked,
A song that’s spoke,
I laugh so hard I almost choke,
When I think about myself.
—Maya Angelou (1928–2014) American Poet
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.
—Georg Christoph Lichtenberg (1742–99) German Philosopher, Physicist
The reformer for whom the world is not good enough finds himself shoulder to shoulder with him that is not good enough for the world.
—George Bernard Shaw (1856–1950) Irish Playwright
Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee and I’ll forgive Thy great big one on me.
—Robert Frost (1874–1963) American Poet
A joke, even if it be a lame one, is nowhere so keenly relished or quickly applauded as in a murder trial.
—Mark Twain (1835–1910) American Humorist
I don’t mind making jokes, but I don’t want to look like one.
—Marilyn Monroe (1926–62) American Actor, Model, Singer
Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. Where be your jibes now, your gambols, your songs, your flashes of merriment that were wont to set the table on a roar?
—William Shakespeare (1564–1616) British Playwright
Advice is sometimes transmitted more successfully through a joke than grave teaching.
—Baltasar Gracian (1601–58) Spanish Scholar, Prose Writer
Prithee don’t screw your wit beyond the compass of good manners.
—Colley Cibber (1671–1757) English Playwright, Poet, Actor
In polite society one laughs at all the jokes, including the ones one has heard before.
—Frank Lane (1896–1981) American Sportsperson, Businessperson
A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
—George Eliot (Mary Anne Evans) (1819–80) English Novelist
‘Tis no extravagant arithmetic to say, that for every ten jokes, thou hast got an hundred enemies; and till thou hast gone on, and raised a swarm of wasps about thine ears, and art half stung to death by them, thou wilt never be convinced it is so.
—Laurence Sterne (1713–68) Irish Anglican Novelist, Clergyman
Be not affronted at a jest; if one throw ever so much salt at thee thou wilt receive no harm unless thou art raw and ulcerous.
—Junius Unidentified English Writer
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