Inspirational Quotations

Inspirational Quotes by Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward) (American Humorist)

Charles Farrar Browne (1834–67,) known by his pen name Artemus Ward, was an American humorist and satirist who helped shape modern American comedic writing. His distinctive style influenced figures such as Mark Twain.

Born in Waterford, Maine, Browne began his career as a printer before transitioning to writing for local newspapers. His wit and storytelling quickly earned him recognition as one of America’s earliest stand-up comedians and a pioneer of humorous literature.

Browne gained national prominence in 1858 with his humorous letters in the Cleveland Plain Dealer, written under the persona of Artemus Ward, a fictional showman with “wax figures” and oddities. Through satire, he critiqued politics, society, and human nature.

His first book, Artemus Ward: His Book (1862,) compiled these writings and became an instant success, blending deadpan humor with social insights. In 1863, he published Artemus Ward: His Travels and began delivering comedic lectures, including Babes in the Wood, which combined storytelling with a conversational style. His lectures were well received both in the U.S. and abroad.

During the Civil War, Browne used humor to support the Union cause. In 1866, he traveled to England and published Artemus Ward: His Lecture in England, where he was warmly welcomed.

More: Wikipedia • READ: Works by Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)

He is dreadfully married. He’s the most married man I ever saw in my life.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)
Topics: Marriage

The happy married man dies in good stile at home, surrounded by his weeping wife and children. The old bachelor don’t die at all—he sort of rots away, like a pollywog’s tail.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)
Topics: Marriage

Let us all be happy, and live within our means, even if we have to borrow the money to do it with.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)
Topics: Money

When a fellow says it hain’t the money but the principle o’ the thing, it’s th’ money.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)
Topics: Money

Trouble will come soon enough, and when he does come receive him as pleasantly as possible. Like the tax collector, he is a disagreeable chap to have in one’s house, but the more amiably you greet him the sooner he will go away.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)
Topics: Acceptance, Trouble

Draw your salary before spending it.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)
Topics: Money

Im not a politician and my other habits are good. Ive no enemys to reward, nor friends to sponge. But Im a Union man.
—Charles Farrar Browne (Artemus Ward)

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