Thin people are beautiful, but fat people are adorable.
—Jackie Gleason
If you have it and you know you have it, then you have it.
If you have it and don’t know you have it, you don’t have it.
If you don’t have it but you think you have it, then you have it.
—Jackie Gleason
The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day, you’re off it.
—Jackie Gleason
Topics: Weight, Diet
Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle
—Jackie Gleason
Topics: Golf
Our dreams are firsthand creations, rather than residues of waking life. We have the capacity for infinite creativity; at least while dreaming, we partake of the power of the Spirit, the infinite Godhead that creates the cosmos.
—Jackie Gleason
Topics: Dreams
Wondering Whom to Read Next?
Tim Robbins American Actor, Director
Bob Hope British-born American Comedian, Film Actor
Vincent Price American Actor
Fred Astaire American Dancer, Singer
Johnny Carson American Comedian
George Carlin American Comedian
George Burns American Comedian
Milton Berle American Entertainer
Will Rogers American Humorist, Actor
Mickey Rourke American Actor