In golf as in life it is the follow through that makes the difference.
—Unknown
I’m the best. I just haven’t played yet.
—Muhammad Ali (1942–2016) American Sportsperson
Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious.
—P. G. Wodehouse (1881–1975) British Novelist, Short-story Writer, Playwright
Many a golfer prefers a golf cart to a caddy because the cart cannot count, criticize or laugh
—Indian Proverb
The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for front-line workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
—Indian Proverb
An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse
—Indian Proverb
I don’t care to join any club that’s prepared to have me as a member.
—Groucho Marx (1890–1977) American Actor, Comedian, Singer
The trees taunt you; the sand mocks you; the water calls your name… and they say golf is a quiet game
—Anonymous
Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you’re the best.
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose.
—Gerald Ford (1913–2006) American Head of State
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick
—P. J. O’Rourke (1947–2022) American Journalist, Political Satirist
Never give a golfer an ultimatum unless you’re prepared to lose
—Pauline Phillips (Abigail van Buren) (b.1918) American Columnist
It’s a funny thing, the more I practice the luckier I get.
—Arnold Palmer (b.1929) American Sportsperson
When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit.
—Indian Proverb
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
—Mark Twain (1835–1910) American Humorist
I have spent most of my life golfing ….. the rest I have just wasted.
—Unknown
The members who command the best service at your golf club either have the lowest handicaps or the highest bar bills
—Indian Proverb
The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don’t know when it’s through if you are a crook or a martyr.
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
Life is a game but golf is serious.
—Unknown
Golf is not, on the whole, a game for realists. By its exactitudes of measurements it invites the attention of perfectionists.
—Heywood Broun (1888–1939) American Journalist
What a shame to waste those great shots on the practice tee
—Walter Lippmann (1889–1974) American Journalist, Political Commentator, Writer
A golf course is the epitome of all that is purely transitory in the universe; a space not to dwell in, but to get over as quickly as possible
—Jean Giraudoux (1882–1944) French Novelist, Playwright, Essayist
A day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.
—William Wordsworth (1770–1850) English Poet
Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad
—A. A. Milne (1882–1956) British Humorist, Playwright, Children’s Writer
If I hit it right, it’s a slice. If I hit it left, it’s a hook. If I hit it straight, it’s a miracle.
—Indian Proverb
Golf is a game in which the slowest people in the world are those in front of you, and the fastest are those behind
—Indian Proverb
Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity, skill scoured by a whiff of arrogance
—Alistair Cooke (1908–2004) British-American Journalist, Broadcaster
I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart.
—Buddy Hackett (1924–2003) American Comedian, Actor
Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren’t penalized for being on grass.
—Bob Hope (1903–2003) British-born American Comedian
I find golf very relaxing. It’s a way to get away from work and get outside. It’s a lot of fun, and once you get going it’s almost kind of addictive.
—Bill Gates (b.1955) American Businessperson, Entrepreneur, Philanthropist, Author
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off.
—Unknown
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
—Jim Bishop (1907–87) American Journalist, Author
I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they’d come up sliced.
—Unknown
When Tiger was 6 months old, he would sit in our garage, watching me hit balls into a net. He had been assimilating his golf swing. When he got out of the high chair, he had a golf swing
—Indian Proverb
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
—Bob Hope (1903–2003) British-born American Comedian
A golfer’s diet: live on greens as much as possible.
—Unknown
The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music.
—Indian Proverb
It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
—Mark Twain (1835–1910) American Humorist
After all, golf is only a game, said Millicent. Women say these things without thinking. It does not mean that there is a kink in their character. They simply don’t realise what they are saying.
—P. G. Wodehouse (1881–1975) British Novelist, Short-story Writer, Playwright
I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters
—Bob Hope (1903–2003) British-born American Comedian
He enjoys that perfect peace, that peace beyond all understanding, which comes at its maximum only to the man who has given up golf.
—P. G. Wodehouse (1881–1975) British Novelist, Short-story Writer, Playwright
I don’t need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course?
—Babe Ruth (1895–1948) American Baseball Legend
A game in which you claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood.
—Unknown
An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging
—Unknown
Show me a man who plays a good game of golf and I’ll show you a man who is neglecting something.
—John F. Kennedy (1917–63) American Head of State, Journalist
Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle
—Jackie Gleason (1916–87) American Comedian, Actor, Conductor
I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone’s golf game: it’s called an eraser.
—Arnold Palmer (b.1929) American Sportsperson
Golf is a game of precision, not strength
—Jack Nicklaus (b.1940) American Sportsperson
Golf is a wonderful exercise. You can stand on your feet for hours, watching somebody else putt
—Will Rogers (1879–1935) American Actor, Rancher, Humorist
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller..
—Winston Churchill (1874–1965) British Head of State, Political leader, Historian, Journalist, Author