We are justified in enforcing good morals, for they belong to all mankind; but we are not justified in enforcing good manners, for good manners always mean our own manners.
—G. K. Chesterton (1874–1936) English Journalist, Novelist, Essayist, Poet
Adorn yourself with all those graces and accomplishments which, without solidity, are frivolous; but without which, solidity is to a great degree useless.
—Earl of Chesterfield (1694–1773) English Statesman, Man of Letters
You can’t be truly rude until you understand good manners.
—Rita Mae Brown (b.1944) American Writer, Feminist
Polish doesn’t change quartz into a diamond.
—Wilma Askinas
Affected simplicity is refined imposture.
—Francois de La Rochefoucauld (1613–80) French Writer
Many who would not take the last cookie would take the last lifeboat.
—Mignon McLaughlin (1913–83) American Journalist, Author
Manner is everything with some people, and something with everybody.
—Conyers Middleton (1683–1750) English Clergyman, Theologian
With virtue, capacity, and good conduct, one still can be insupportable. The manners, which are neglected as small things, are often those which decide men for or against you. A slight attention to them would have prevented their ill judgments.
—Jean de La Bruyere (1645–96) French Satiric Moralist, Author
A commercial society whose members are essentially ascetic and indifferent in social ritual has to be provided with blueprints and specifications for evoking the right tone for every occasion.
—Marshall Mcluhan (1911–80) Canadian Writer, Thinker, Educator
Knowledge of men and manners, the freedom of habitudes, and conversation with the best company of both sexes, is necessary to the perfection of good manners.
—John Dryden (1631–1700) English Poet, Literary Critic, Playwright
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.
—Isaac Asimov (1920–92) Russian-born American Writer, Scientist
Let your countenance be pleasant, but in serious matters let it be somewhat grave.
—George Washington (1732–99) American Head of State, Military Leader
An armed society is a polite society. Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life.
—Robert A. Heinlein (1907–88) American Science Fiction Writer
Good breeding consists in having no particular mark of any profession, but a general elegance of manners.
—Samuel Johnson (1709–84) British Essayist
To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered.
—Voltaire (1694–1778) French Philosopher, Author
What once were vices are manners now.
—Seneca the Younger (Lucius Annaeus Seneca) (c.4 BCE–65 CE) Roman Stoic Philosopher, Statesman, Tragedian
I seek constantly to improve my manners and graces, for they are the sugar to which all are attracted.
—Og Mandino (1923–96) American Self-Help Author
The immoral man, who invades another’s property, is justly punished for it; and the ill bred man, who by his ill manners invades and disturbs the quiet and comforts of private life, is by common consent as justly banished society. For my own part, I really think, next to the consciousness of doing a good action, that of doing a civil one is the most pleasing; and the epithet which I should covet the most, next to that of Aristides (the Just), would be that of well bred.
—Earl of Chesterfield (1694–1773) English Statesman, Man of Letters
Manners are of such great consequence to the novelist that any kind will do. Bad manners are better than no manners at all, and because we are losing our customary manners, we are probably overly conscious of them; this seems to be a condition that produces writers.
—Flannery O’Connor (1925–1964) American Novelist
Manners are especially the need of the plain. The pretty can get away with anything.
—Evelyn Waugh (1903–66) British Novelist, Essayist, Biographer
Good manners is the art of making those people easy with whom we converse; whoever makes the fewest persons uneasy, is the best bred man in company.
—Jonathan Swift (1667–1745) Irish Satirist
Whom one wants to change manners and customs, one should not do so by changing the laws.
—Montesquieu (1689–1755) French Political Philosopher, Jurist
To know what people really think, pay regard to what they do, rather than what they say.
—Rene Descartes (1596–1650) French Mathematician, Philosopher
There is certainly something of exquisite kindness and thoughtful benevolence in that rarest of gifts,—fine breeding.
—Edward Bulwer-Lytton, 1st Baron Lytton (1803–73) British Novelist, Poet, Politician
It’s not a slam at you when people are rude – it’s a slam at the people they’ve met before.
—F. Scott Fitzgerald (1896–1940) American Novelist
Nature is the best posture-master.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803–82) American Philosopher
Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
—Ambrose Bierce (1842–1913) American Short-story Writer, Journalist
Still people are dangerous.
—Jean de La Fontaine (1621–95) French Poet, Short Story Writer
Men, like bullets, go farthest when they are smoothest.
—Jean Paul (1763–1825) German Novelist, Humorist
It is the privilege of any human work which is well done to invest the doer with a certain haughtiness. He can well afford not to conciliate, whose faithful work will answer for him.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803–82) American Philosopher
A man’s manners are the mirror in which he shows his portrait.
—Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749–1832) German Poet
Some are able and humane men and some are low-grade individuals with the morals of a goat, the artistic integrity of a slot machine, and the manners of a floorwalker with delusions of grandeur.
—Raymond Chandler (1888–1959) American Novelist
Courtesy should be a continuous action, not something to be turned on and off like a faucet.
—Unknown
I place a high moral value on the way people behave. I find it repellent to have a lot, and to behave with anything other than courtesy in the old sense of the word—politeness of the heart, a gentleness of the spirit.
—Emma Thompson (b.1959) British Actress, Screenwriter, Activist
Ceremonies are different in every country, but true politeness is everywhere the same.
—Oliver Goldsmith (1730–74) Irish Novelist, Playwright, Poet
All doors open to courtesy.
—Thomas Fuller (1608–61) English Cleric, Historian
The distinguishing trait of people accustomed to good society is a calm, imperturbable quiet which pervades all their actions and habits, from the greatest to the least. They eat in quiet, move in quiet, live in quiet, and lose even their money in quiet; while low persons cannot take up either a spoon or an affront without making an amazing noise about it.
—Jean de La Bruyere (1645–96) French Satiric Moralist, Author
Teach your child to hold his tongue; he’ll learn fast enough to speak.
—Benjamin Franklin (1706–90) American Political Leader, Inventor, Diplomat
Perfect behavior is born of complete indifference.
—Cesare Pavese (1908–50) Italian Novelist, Poet, Critic, Translator
People who stare deserve the looks they get.
—Malcolm S. Forbes (1919–1990) American Publisher, Businessperson
In conversation use some, but not too much ceremony; it teaches others to be courteous, too. Demeanors are commonly paid back in their own coin.
—Thomas Fuller (1608–61) English Cleric, Historian
Courtesy is the one coin you can never have too much of or be stingy with.
—John Wanamaker (1838–1922) American Merchant, Civil Servant
Act the way you’d like to be and soon you’ll be the way you act.
—George W. Crane (1901–95) American Psychologist, Physician
Contraries are cured by contraries.
—Common Proverb
The small courtesies sweeten life; the greater ennoble it.
—Christian Nestell Bovee (1820–1904) American Writer, Aphorist
Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength.
—Eric Hoffer (1902–83) American Philosopher, Author
Manners are one of the greatest engines of influence ever given to man.
—Richard Whately (1787–1863) English Philosopher, Theologian
Nowadays, manners are easy and life is hard.
—Benjamin Franklin (1706–90) American Political Leader, Inventor, Diplomat
Politeness is to human nature what warmth is to wax.
—Arthur Schopenhauer (1788–1860) German Philosopher
Nothing is less important than which fork you use. Etiquette is the science of living. It embraces everything. It is ethics. It is honor.
—Emily Post (1873–1960) American Writer, Socialite